Learning to Praise God "Even If We Lose"

There’s a movie called Facing the Giants. It’s by the same church that put out Fireproof. It’s a feel-good football movie with a plot that is pretty familiar so far as movies go: Ragtag team of misfits can’t win a game to save their life. They’re resigned to being losers, until a coach takes heart in them. He helps them overcome the odds and come from behind to win the league—become the champions that few believed in.

(For me, the original of this genre will always be “The Mighty Ducks.”)

Anyway, this is that with a Christian twist. The team becomes good because they begin playing for “a higher cause.” (It’s a small-town Christian school, so they can get away with that.)

My husband thought the movie was really cheesy, which it is—but so are pretty much all the other movies in this category. Nonetheless, I truly enjoyed it, cheese and all.

The reason I bring the movie up isn’t to review it but to share a line that was repeated throughout the movie that I fell in love with. As the team prepared for each game of the season, the coach told them, “If we win, we’re going to praise God. And if we lose, we’re going to praise God. No matter what happens tonight on that football field, we’re going to make the choice to praise God for it.”

This simple, made-up movie scene has stuck with me and encourages me in the moments when I’m discouraged or questioning why God isn’t doing something or has let something happen. It stops me in my tracks and reminds me that in spite of what my emotions or circumstances might say about a situation, I need to praise God for it.

As Job says, in the midst of having lost all his livestock, his children and his health, “Should we take only good things from God and not trouble?" (Job 2:10)

It’s not easy to swallow my pride and thank God for the situation that’s inconvenient or frustrating or the exact opposite of what I’ve been praying for. But I grit my teeth and praise him anyway, taking the bad along with the good, and expecting him to fulfill his word and bring redemption, somehow, someway.

For the month of December, I’m taking a break from writing new posts to better enjoy the holidays with family and friends. Instead, I’ll be sharing some of my favorite posts from my first two years of blogging here. I hope you enjoy getting to do a little time-traveling with me, and I’ll be back to ring in the new year with all new posts! (Click here to see today’s original post.)

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Asking for My Daily Bread: God’s Provision

Sometimes I feel guilty about how the fact that my husband and I both are still searching for full-time jobs always seems to creep into conversations. And that it's been creeping into conversations for over a year now. It must get awfully boring to hear me say, yet again, "I don't know where we'll be," or updates about how the latest job news is going.

But honestly that is what is at the forefront of our reality right now. And I think we all have those things; for me (and too many others) it's employment, perhaps for someone else it's relationships or infertility or moving or health. It seems that we're never given much of a reprieve before something "else" crops up to captivate our attention.

For now, in my life, it's a job, my daily bread.

But, surprisingly, I'm not discouraged by that, though. For some beautiful, merciful reason, the Lord has given me an incredible sense of peace regarding this season of our life when everything seems up in the air and we still seem to be fumbling through the fog. As each month passes, I continue (for the most part) to grow in my confidence that the Lord is at work here. I have a comforting sense of peace about the fact that he does indeed go before us and prepare the way for us. So, rather than worry, I continue to wait on him to answer.

It's an interesting thing that even though God tells us that he knows all our needs and will deliver us, he also commands us to ask him—persistently: "God will always give what is right to his people who cry to him night and day, and he will not be slow to answer them. I tell you, God will help his people quickly." (Luke 18:7)

In The Magician’s Nephew by C.S. Lewis, Digory has to go on a mission and finds that he needs food and complains about it, noting that Aslan must have known that he’d need to eat and get hungry on the trip. His companion speaks words of wisdom as he responds to the ilk of, “Yes, I’m sure he did know you'd get hungry and need food. But you didn’t ask. I have the feeling that sometimes he just likes to be asked, even if he knows you need it anyway.”

So, my prayers right now are for provision.

As the time ticks and my job draws closer to a close (nothing set in stone just yet) and no opportunities  arise, I wonder, "What will happen next?" for us. All I know to do is pray. Keep praying. Keep asking. Keep trusting.

But those who wait on the LORD will find new strength.
They will fly high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.

They will walk and not faint.
Isaiah 40:31

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A Handy Resource for Discerning God's Will for Your Life

When I was trying to figure out whether to move to Grand Rapids or not, I sat down with the youth pastor at our church who I volunteered with (and who later introduced me and Michael and officiated our wedding). We went through why I wanted to move and I remember saying something about wanting to do God's will.

He shared a great illustration with me about how he understands this idea of God's will: Picture God's will as a big golf-style umbrella. Though the umbrella is small compared to the storm outside, it's big enough for you to stand various places under the umbrella. And so long as you're under the umbrella, you'll be kept dry from the rain. There's not just one, single spot and if you're not standing directly under it, you'll be pelted with thunderbolts. Rather, God is merciful and gives us options of where to stand under the umbrella of "his will."

This was the first time someone had introduced me to the concept of God's will as being one that is freeing rather than one that is confusing and condemning.

Last winter, I read an article that I found particularly insightful. In it, the author shares basic insights into discerning God's will. He points out that much of what God cares about most, he has revealed to us in the Bible--sure he cares about what job you take, but what he cares about most is your heart and your relationship with him. The author says, "Much of God's will has already been made plain....We must be willing to do his will in those things he has already revealed, if we are to know his will in those things he has not yet made known."

He then goes on to remind us that God usually doesn't make everything plain upfront, but leads us (often times unnoticably) as we go along. "However much we would like to know things in advance, there is no need for it. God wants us to trust him to open the right doors at the right time. And if we get to a door and it doesn't open, maybe God is asking us to wait as he has some more work to do on us first. Or maybe he is turning us in another direction," the author writes.

He also encourages readers to remember that God has gifted us with wisdom for a reason--and expects us to use it. "If God gives us wisdom to know what is the best path to take, that is just as much his guidance as giving us some special sign. This may involve hard work in grappling with issues, seeking advice and weighing up the options; but all this is part of our growing up."

Finally, he lists some of the things to consider as we weigh a decision with wisdom: What is God saying to me through the Bible? Do I have "the peace of God, which transcends all understanding" in regards to this decision? What do other godly Christians say about this decision? Are circumstances aligning to open doors or are they pulling closed?

(You can read the article in it's entirety here.)

I've found these reminders especially encouraging, as I find myself looking to the future, and wondering where God will have me. What's his will for me in all this?

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Learning About God's Loyalty Firsthand

I am pleased to share that today an article I wrote is posted at Ungrind.org!

"The Loyal God" shares about the first time I really ever had to step out in faith and trust in God's loyalty. It was only a couple of years ago, but that experience has shaped my life and bolstered my faith like nothing else. At the time, it was terrifying. But now, only in hindsight, I can see how life-giving and foundational it was for me.

And for those of you unfamiliar, Ungrind.org is a webzine catering to 20- and 30-something women to encourage them in their faith. "Here at Ungrind," the website explains, "we hope you'll find that word. It's our goal to churn out weekly encouragement by being honest and transparent about our struggles, but in a way that inspires hope, faith, and perseverance. Consider us friends. The kind you feel comfortable sitting across the table with at the local coffee shop."

Come read my article and let me know what you think!

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When We Try to Make God Choose (A) or (B)

Here's a confession for you: Often when I go to God about decisions I’m making, I come to him with my proposal typed out and neat and tidy in a folder. I lay it all out on the table and show him how I’ve narrowed it down to two choices, A and B, and which would he like to choose?

The reality of this astounds me. That I have the audacity to take the God of the Universe, the Creator of everything complex and incomprehensible who wrote this great story that we call Life and Eternity, who is bigger than anything I can imagine and who understands it all and somehow stitches this huge tapestry together into one great, intricate and beautiful masterpiece; and I give him a multiple-choice quiz with two possible answers: A or B.

Of course I don't realize I'm doing it at the time; I simply fail to see beyond my human eyes and perspective of what the possibilities are. It's only later or even in hindsight, that I realize how greatly narrowed my convention of "answers" are. And it's not just me; people did that to Jesus back when he was alive, too: taking to him these questions or demands and presenting them to him as having only two options. But time and time again, He would break that mold and show them how close-minded their thinking truly was, instead showing them (and us) another route or another question that never crossed their mind.

I realize that what is better, what is more fruitful, is to focus simply on just asking God the question and leave it at that; stop it with the “I’ve already analyzed the situation, so choose between these two.” Go to him from the beginning with the raw question and leave it open-ended. “What do you want? What do you want me to do with this?” and then…wait and listen.

This acknowledges that he knows better than we do and that his answers are so much better than the lousy and limiting–and un-interesting!–A and B choices I often give him. Even more than that, it's his desire to want the best for me even more than I do. There are so many other options; I need not strip him of his creativity and his power. Option C can be so much greater than I ever could have imagined!

I will bring you gold in place of bronze,
silver in place of iron, bronze in place of wood,
iron in place of stones.
Isaiah 60:17

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What doing "nothing" for a day taught me

photo by safetylast

Last week, Michael and I attempted our first-ever "Sabbath." I had always thought the Sabbath was about resting and giving our bodies and minds and spirits time to stop and breathe. I do think it's about that, but if that's all it were, wouldn't we all embrace the replenishment wholeheartedly? Why do we instead fight it? Why is it so hard to spend a day not doing?

In our Judaism class, we touched on the Sabbath and our rabbi pointed out something that I'd never really thought about: In Old Testament times, these people worked with their hands whether farmers or sheepherders, etc. Taking a day off from work was not just a day off from running errands, but a day off from their livelihood. What would happen to the soil? To the weeds cropping up? To the seeds that need to be sowed? To the animals creeping around the plants? Taking a day off could really impact your seasonal harvest and whether you have enough to eat, to keep warm, to live. It was literally a sacrifice.

And so for them, taking a Sabbath was an act of trust and faith. Trusting that God will stay faithful and help you get everything done that you need to get done, that he will multiply your efforts, despite the fact that you took a day off to spend with him.

Hearing that, I realized, that has been the root of my lack of Sabbath. The resting part sounds great, but really I need to get this done or that done, which trumps God's command. Which is a lack of trust that what I sow into him, he will reap into a harvest that I cannot fathom. This time is not lost, but invested in such a way that to-do lists cannot capture.

So we Sabbathed last week, from sundown to sundown. I knew I'd be laying my computer aside and not touching any work. I worked ahead to have our next day's lunch ready. But there were little things I hadn't expected to be difficult to me: Wanting to put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher, wanting to pick up around the house, wanting to fold up the laundry. They were just little things--not really work, I reasoned. I had to fight the urge to "do" and to trust that when it came time, it'd all get done, it'd all be fine.

And, of course, it was. Because God is good.

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When I was Young: Remembering what Jesus was like to me as a child

photo by erica_marshall

It was as a child that I first heard people talking about “asking Jesus to come into your heart.” I remember being young—probably five or six—and hearing the pastor invite us to pray this prayer, inviting Jesus into our hearts. I prayed that prayer and I remember going home and believing it.

Like I said, I was really young. So I took this prayer literally: In my mind’s eye, Jesus had shrunken down to a two-inch miniature and climbed into my heart’s chamber and was tacking a little “Home Sweet Home” sign up. I imagined my heart was something out of how they showed the insight of the genie bottle in “I Dream of Jeannie,” with red-velvet walls and a big plush couch that Jesus reclined on.

Being the eldest child, I was used to entertaining myself. So at night, I would tell Jesus stories, since, you know, we were having a slumber party and everything.

I’m not sure when I outgrew this idea and many times I wish I hadn’t. I wish I still pictured Jesus there with me all the time, rather than pushing him aside too much of the time or altogether forgetting he’s there alongside me. I wish I still believed so simply, so wholeheartedly, so lovingly.

I imagine that’s much of why he commended the faith of children, saying in Luke 18:15-17, “Let the little children come to me. Don't stop them, because the kingdom of God belongs to people who are like these children. I tell you the truth, you must accept the kingdom of God as if you were a child, or you will never enter it.”

…the kingdom of God belongs to people who are like these children.

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Pinpointing the thoughts that hurt us: A book review

In her book, "Every Thought Captive," Jerusha Clark takes the well-known verse that admonishes us to "take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ" and helps readers understand what that actually looks like.

Throughout the book, Clark pinpoints some of the most common unhealthy and detrimental thoughts that plague a woman's mind, like those that tell her she's not good enough or thin enough, that it was all her fault and she's always messing up, that she doesn't have enough time or that everything's going to come crashing down any moment.

Often, we think these kinds of thoughts without even being aware of it, but that's where this book comes in handy: By going through each section and the list of lies that Clark identifies, readers can begin to recognize the lies that are most recurrent in their own lives.

For me, that came to life as I read through the section "One More Thing," which looks at our desires for "more" and our temptation to think that this "one more thing" will make us happy--if only temporarily. She gave an example of her search for new black shoes, and how she went shopping everywhere to try to track them down. "I never thought the black shoes would bring me ultimate satisfaction," she writes, "but I certainly thought they would bring me relief from gnawing desire....Sometimes I realize that I've wanted something more than I've wanted God."

This is an episode I know all too well--whether it's searching for the perfect pair of curtains or, ahem, new artwork for my kitchen wall. In doing so, we are putting our satisfaction in things, rather than in God and being satisfied by what he has already given us. She reminds readers that God gives bountifully and without ceasing, meeting all our needs. And it's those kinds of biblical truths I can keep in mind when the lie of "one more thing" pops up--undoubtedly, again and again.

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I Didn't Get the Job: A Story with a Silver Lining

photo by bluecinderellee

Do you remember that a month and a half ago, right when I started this blog, I asked for prayer regarding a job interview and then shared how well the interview and all the circumstances surrounding it went? Well, a week later, I received a call back from them asking me to come in for a second interview. Everyone interviewing me was talking to me, treating me as though I already had the job. And that's how I was feeling.

Until it had been two weeks, three weeks and I hadn't heard a peep. Even after giving them a phone call follow-up and hearing nothing. That's when I began to realize...I don't think I got this job.

Up until now, any job I've ever had an in-person job interview for, I've been offered the position. I had thanked God that he'd never opened any door that he didn't deliver on, job-wise. I thought, how kind he is to spare me from that kind of disappointment and rejection!

Well, no longer. I got a very kind and amicable phone call today from the woman in HR who let me know that they've decided to move forward with another candidate. Now I had fully been expecting this, seeing as I hadn't heard anything in almost a month. Still, it's humbling to hear the words, when I'd been thinking, 'Maybe, just maybe..."

Previous to hearing this, I'd already committed to trust God with whatever he was doing in this situation. I had stopped praying for this specific job and stepped back to ask that he simply provide an income for us and that it be something I enjoy. I'd decided that whether this job came through or did not, that I would give praise to God, trusting that just as he is the One who is, was and is to come, that he has done great things for me, is doing great things for me and will do great things for me. Though I can't always see those great things happening right now, I will not fret but will wait patiently and expectantly for him to fulfill these promises of his.

Disappointing though it is, there are a couple silver linings: First of all, I asked the woman from HR for any feedback regarding my interview and she shared that the biggest decision-maker was that the other candidate had 12 years of experience versus my five. She said that I was a strong second candidate, and that they'd enjoy entertaining me in the future for other opportunities. That was encouraging to my slightly bruised ego. Secondly, with the suspicion that the job offer was going nowhere fast, I followed up with my current boss to see about extending my freelance contract through the new year. (Currently, it was slated to expire December 31.) She emailed me back almost immediately to let me know she'd been talking to upper managment about that very thing and would like to have me continue through January and likely February.

So, it's another month without having to wonder about income or dipping into savings. It is not exactly the stability I yearn for, but I think that's what God has been teaching me lately: To learn to trust him for my daily bread. To give him the chance to provide for me, month after month after quitting my job. With the peace that comes from him alone, I am thankful and encouraged, about all that was, that is and that is to come.

"...What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open."
Revelation 3:7

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Discerning God's Will for Your Life: Some basic principles to guide you

photo by eternal

One of the things that I feel like God has been shepherding me through over the past year is understanding the illusive idea of "God's will." We hear people talk about this so much, but how do we really know what he wants us to do, particularly when it comes down to grey areas like "Should I take this job or that job?" or "Should I speak up and say something about her choices?"

When I was trying to figure out whether to move to Grand Rapids or not, I sat down with the youth pastor at our church who I volunteered with (and who later introduced me and Michael and officiated our wedding). We went through why I wanted to move and I remember saying soemthing about wanting to do God's will. He shared a great illustration with me about how he understands this idea of God's will: Picture God's will as a big golf-style umbrella. Though the umbrella is small compared to the storm outside, it's big enough for you to stand various places under the umbrella. And so long as you're under the umbrella, you'll be kept dry from the rain. There's not just one, single spot and if you're not standing directly under it, you'll be pelted with thunderbolts. Rather, God is merciful and gives us options of where to stand under the umbrella of "his will."

This was the first time someone had introduced me to the concept of God's will as being one that is freeing rather than one that is confusing and condemning.

Last winter, I read an article that I found particularly insightful. In it, the author shares basic insights into discerning God's will. He points out that much of what God cares about most, he has revealed to us in the Bible--sure he cares about what job you take, but what he cares about most is your heart and your relationship with him. The author says, "Much of God's will has already been made plain....We must be willing to do his will in those things he has already revealed, if we are to know his will in those things he has not yet made known."

He then goes on to remind us that God usually doesn't make everything plain upfront, but leads us (often times unnoticably) as we go along. "However much we would like to know things in advance, there is no need for it. God wants us to trust him to open the right doors at the right time. And if we get to a door and it doesn't open, maybe God is asking us to wait as he has some more work to do on us first. Or maybe he is turning us in another direction," the author writes.

He also encourages readers to remember that God has gifted us with wisdom for a reason--and expects us to use it. "If God gives us wisdom to know what is the best path to take, that is just as much his guidance as giving us some special sign. This may involve hard work in grappling with issues, seeking advice and weighing up the options; but all this is part of our growing up."

Finally, he lists some of the things to consider as we weigh a decision with wisdom: What is God saying to me through the Bible? Do I have "the peace of God, which transcends all understanding" in regards to this decision? What do other godly Christians say about this decision? Are circumstances aligning to open doors or are they pulling closed?

(You can read the article in it's entirety here.)

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What a step of faith looks like: Living in anticipation of our future goals

photo by denis defreyne 

Yesterday, I touched on the idea of making do with what you have as a characteristic of the Proverbs 31 wife. Toward the end, I mentioned that I'm doing much of this in preparation for the day when I have a family, even though we're a couple years away from that (at least accordding to our plan!).

When I was still single, I read a book that talked about the idea of living in anticipation of our future goals. The aptly named book, Get Married by Candice Watters, revolved around the idea of a woman's desire to be married. The author encouraged readers to live like they're going to be married--that is, act in a manner befitting of a wife. That translates to things like not being a flirt or being wise with your finances (since a husband will inherit your debt, too).

She notes that this kind of preparatory train of thought is an outward act of faith: Even though, in the case of the book, the reader is single and marriage seems far off, once you put this desire before God in prayer, you then begin preparing in these sorts of ways because you expect him to answer. That is stepping out in faith.

Since then, I have clung to this idea and tried to live it out, from my prayers for marriage to my prayers for new jobs. I have also begun applying it to my prayers for the day when I become a mother and start raising our family.

Even though it may not be for a couple years that this prayer comes to fruition (and for now we're glad for that, while Michael finishes up school!), I want to begin learning the art of homemaking now so that by the time this is in full-swing and I have a little one depending on me, I will be prepared. I won't look at my cupboards and freak out because I don't know what to make for dinner. I won't look at our finances and freak out because we haven't prepared for this transition. I know that when that time comes, I'll have enough to worry about as it is. I want to live today to make tomorrow as promising and fulfilling as possible.

For me, I am learning to live like I'm going to be a parent. But for you, it may be some other prayer that God has laid on your heart--a job, a spouse, a healing, a specific provision. Consider what steps of faith you can do today to pave the way for tomorrow's answered prayer. Hebrews 11:1 encourages us, "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."

... She looks forward to the future with joy.
Proverbs 31:25

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Learning to embrace where God was calling me--even when it was the last thing I wanted to do

photo by manunited 

Two winters ago, I was chaperoning our youth group to a teen conference in Gatlinburg, Tennessee. I remember we were in the auditorium and as the band was playing a song, one line stuck out to me: “Where you lead me, I will follow….Even if I walk alone, Lord, this I choose to do,” As I sang along, the reality of that lyric hit me. And I prayed, God I love you, but please don’t make me go anywhere by myself. Please don’t make me have to do it alone. Please don’t…

Six months later, I was packing my belongings in boxes, preparing to move to a new city, for a new job…by myself. And yet, now, I was now doing it willingly, even enthusiastically. God had changed my heart: He made me excited about this change and impressed upon me, time and time again, that this was what I needed to do. Even though it was scary, he equipped me with all the courage I needed to overcome this fear.

I learned a lot from that experienced, but what I especially learned was how good God is. I think many of us are afraid that God is going to make us do things we don’t want to do--he’s going to call the person who loves small, hometown life and send her off to be a missionary in Africa. Or he’s going to make someone else who loves to dance, stop dancing. This is a grave misunderstanding of who God is. God loves us. He does not delight in making us miserable. And that’s the fear many of us hold in our hearts.

As I learned from my experience, even when God does call you to do that which is completely unnatural to you, he helps you reach the point to where you can embrace it--where you know it’s good for you. God even says that he will give us the desires of our heart. He is good. And anything that he is calling us to is for our own good.  I truly believe that, if we trust him and an idea of what he’s calling us toward, that he will fill in the gap of fear we might have and he’ll make the path straight.

For me, my journey to doing the unthinkable and moving to Michigan by myself was a long road: First I got the idea of finding a job in the Christian publishing world. Then I made a new friend who was talking about moving to Grand Rapids with another friend. Lo and behold, there are three Christian publishers in the little town of Grand Rapids. As it turns out, one of those publishers is the only company who asked to interview me and then give me a job. But around this time, my friend found another opportunity in another city to explore and though I was scared of being on my own, God had given me a heart of courage and a deep sense of peace regarding this decision. I encouraged her to go to Kansas City instead, and suddenly found myself living out the lyrics I had once prayed so adamantly against.

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Some of the everyday miracles God has blessed us with lately

I’ve found that it’s important for me to marvel over the incredible, albeit everyday, miracles God has blessed me with. I’ve also found that hearing about other people’s everyday miracles can be quite an encouragement to my own faith, particularly in those times when doubt begins to set in or when I start to grow impatient with my own prayers as God seems nowhere to be found. Hearing testimonies from other people who I actually know, encourages me to press on and continue to wait and hold the cry of Psalm 27 dear: "I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD."

So here are just a couple recent examples of how God has answered our prayers, worked through us or provided for us when circumstances looked otherwise:

A critter in the night: Our unwelcome houseguest
We live in an old apartment building from the 1920s. Despite the fact that we're on the second floor, we've occasionally woken up in the middle of the night to a scratching in our bedroom wall. The first time was about 2 months ago, but by banging on the wall whenever the scratching started (I was going for a Pavlovian scare-tactic effect), the critter soon gave up and abandoned its post in our wall. This past week though, we awoke in the middle of the night to a new noise. This scratching wouldn't stop and we could hear it moving in the wall. It went on for two nights, waking us up. I'd bang on the wall to see if that would be another easy answer, but no such luck with this persistent fellow: He just kept on scampering and scratching. Finally, Michael got the bright idea: To pray about it. He prayed for the animal to leave and immediately the noise stopped...and has not come again since. We shouldn't be surprised that when we pray for something, that God would answer us--we should be more surprised when we pray and nothing happens. And yet we were.

Perfect timing for a belated $25 check
Michael and I tithe, but we like to give depending on where needs lie--whether it's to a new cause we've discovered or a friend in need as well as to our church. Last month, Michael wanted to send some money to one of his friends who is interning at a church in California. By the time Michael got around to writing the check, we only had $25 left of our tithe for the month, but he went ahead and wrote the check anyway, hoping it would be helpful even though it wasn't very substantial at all. Within days, we received a phone call from his friend who was freaking out: Evidently one of his bills had been raised by $25 that month and because he was living month-to-month, he had not allotted money to cover the increase. He wasn't sure what to do, but then our check arrived that day--the exact amount he needed. We were afraid it wouldn't really be useful and yet God aligned the timing and amount to provide for exactly what was needed and when it was needed--no more, no less. What beautiful providence.

Filling our cupboards when our grocery budget was spent
Michael and I keep a monthly budget that we still fight and wrestle against to stay within its limits. We had reached every dollar limit for every category and still had a week to go. Our fridge was lacking and our pantry bare, but we really wanted to try to stick to our month-to-month budget and make do with what we did happen to have.  It wasn’t even something I thought to pray about, but just as soon as we were trying to figure out what our next meal might consist of (pasta and veggie burger? peanut butter and jelly sandwich?), we received a $50 Trader Joe’s gift card for Michael as a belated birthday gift. It could not have been more perfect timing for us and we were able to get everything on our shopping list--even a new kind of beer to try, in celebration. Just as God feeds the birds in the air, he keeps our bellies full, too. We are indeed worth more to him than the little birds.

Through all of these, God again and again reminds me that he “already knows all [my] needs and he will give [me] all [I] need from day to day if [I] live for him and make the kingdom of God [my] primary concern.” (Matthew 6:32) I’m still learning (and praying) to make him my primary concern--I would not say that I’ve reached that maturity in my faith yet by any means. Still he remains faithful, even now, as I learn.

P.S. To stay updated, you can have all my future blog posts sent directly to you via email or RSS feed by clicking on those links. (Let me know if they don't work.) Thanks for reading! 

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Unexpected insights from a boring Old Testament list

photo by Static of the Gods

I've started doing my daily Bible reading by following the "Different Topic Every Day" reading plan available at http://www.heartlight.org. It's been helpful for me to do this prescribed daily reading plan because too often I'd find myself sitting with my Bible open, not knowing where to read and feeling lost as I'd skip around, from page to page, more or less just idling time. So, for the time being, this is how I'm doing my daily Bible reading. It's set up to get you through the whole Bible in a year.

Anyway, today's reading was in the ever exciting Old Testament book of Numbers, detailing all the places the Israelites went after they left Egypt on their way to the promised land, West of the Jordan River. As I was reading, I found myself start skimming, going, "Yeah, yeah, yeah. They moved a lot of places. Let's skip ahead to the good stuff."

Which made me wonder: Why did God include this laundry list of locations? Why is this important? Obviously it must be, to make it in the Holy Word, so what might that be? Over and over again they moved around on this journey to their home. Perhaps this is a bird's eye view of all our lives: God is moving us from point a to b to c to d to e...

And then I noticed that as Moses listed each location, occasionally he'd offer a short description like this place was a desert, this one was without any water or it was an oasis with "12 springs and 70 palm trees." This list goes from Numbers 33:5-37, so about 32 moves. Of these, there are 4 deserts they journey through, one noted place where "there was no water for the people to drink," a sea they journey through and one oasis that they reach after making their way out of the wilderness. Most of the time, though, the places were pretty ordinary with little to say about them.

Does this sound like our lives? A few notable peaks and valleys, and a lot of seemingly unmentionable stuff in the middle? And yet, God mentions it. Verse 2 says, "At the LORD's command Moses wrote down the places where they went as they traveled. This is the list." He watched and recorded it all. And because God is the same as he ever was, he continues to watch it and record it all in our journeys even now. Every blip on the map matters to him and take us to where we're going: The promised land.

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Why we moved to Atlanta--and left a well-paying job, in this economy

photo by chany14

I thought I’d share a little bit about the decision-making that went into our decision to move to Atlanta as newlyweds.

As most of you know, my husband and I met and dated long-distance for the first 10 months of our courtship. My husband had long-intended to spend his summer in Grand Rapids with me, but when we got engaged and decided to get married over the summer, we had a decision to make: Stay in Michigan or move to Atlanta?

While some people encouraged us to consider a long-distance marriage (seriously), we knew that was out of the question. There were benefits and drawbacks to each option:

In Michigan, I had a well-paying, full-time job with good benefits. In this economy, that is not to be taken lightly. However, it would mean having to figure out an alternative for my husband finishing up college. Ultimately, our goal is that when we start our family, he will be the breadwinner so that I can stay home and raise our kids (which is the way both of us were raised and has been my heart’s desire for raising my own family). So it was very important that we not delay him finishing up his degree and getting a job, plus he is studying to be a teacher and the teaching market is pretty nonexistent in Michigan, so we guessed that eventually we’d have to move anyway for him to find a job.

Moving to Atlanta, though, was full of question marks. My husband would be able to finish up his last year in college, uninterrupted. He has a scholarship that covers his entire tuition, which we both consider a great perk because we want to keep our debt to a minimum--even if it is “good debt.” Georgia’s teaching market is more favorable than that in Michigan or Ohio. However, it would mean me leaving my job and us not knowing what we would do for income or how we would get by.

Once he moved to Grand Rapids, we spent the first month praying about this decision until we ultimately decided to make the decision in favor of our future rather than our current circumstances: We would move to Atlanta.

Now, at the time, as I was praying through it, I didn’t feel that we had to move to Atlanta. I really felt like God impressed upon me that both decisions were good decisions and either one would be okay. However, the Atlanta decision was a greater leap of faith while staying in Grand Rapids would mostly be made out of fear of the unknown. With that on my heart, we decided in favor of moving to Atlanta.

And I have to say it was a great decision. Time after time, God has awed me with his provision and blessing during this move, from a steady (albeit impermanent) income to enough wedding money to pay for our entire ($1500+) move down here, and then some. We continue to thank God for each day he has given us, our manna that provides us with our daily bread. Though we still don’t know what awaits us or how this will all work out, we continue to trust that he will be faithful to his Word and his name: Jehovah Jireh, God our Provider.

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