Misconceptions in Blogland

The other day I was trying to pass the time until my husband got home from work. I was looking up recipes and reloading Pinterest when something popped into my head to visit a blog I used to read but had unsubscribed from a year or so ago. (You can read more about why I unsubscribed from that blog—and a bunch of other ones—in this post.)

It was a blog with pictures of happy days spent strolling the streets, wearing cute clothes, perfect make-up and what seemed like a wish-you-were-here kind of lifestyle.

But as I started reading through recent posts, it became evident that something had changed. The façade had shattered.

The thing is, I was shocked by it. I had really bought into the idea that her life was great and, well, probably better than mine. I mean, did you see those shoes? That weekend? That meal? That vacation?

Without even realizing it, I’d bought into the idea that what I saw on the screen was all there was to it. Hardships must not exist. Feelings of loneliness or jealousy never plague. Cross words never pierce the days or make you wish you could hit the “undo” button. The folks on the other side of the screen? They're never the ones wishing for something different.

Of course, though, we know that in reality, that is far from true.

I don’t think the blogger ever set out to make her life appear perfect or always happy or better than mine, but somehow, that’s how it always felt to me. Which is one of the reasons why I stopped reading it.

As I plumbed through her posts, I realized that because you read my blog, you’ve probably fallen into that trap, too, and made some of the same kinds of misconceptions about me.

I really try to keep this place real and share some of my weaknesses and how the Lord is redeeming them. I try to be up-front about the fact that I don’t have it all together, whether it’s in my cooking or my cleaning or my self-confidence in Christ.

But of course this blog is only a small, piecemeal snapshot of my life, one that has been edited and refined and stitched back together in places so that it makes sense. And so it’s likely—it’s almost certain—that you’ve stitched together your own idea of who I am that bears little resemblance to the real thing.

You probably think I’m way nicer than I am. You probably think I love God more than I do. You probably think I’m a better cook or a better wife or a better friend or a better daughter than I am. You probably think a thousand different things about me that I really do wish were true but probably are not. In all reality? I’m probably a lot more like you than you realize.

And that’s probably a good thing, don’t you think?

I say all this because as I realized the false perception I’d made about this other woman—whose life I’d imagined was better than my own—I realized that what I was doing when I read her blog was that I had been comparing myself to her and came away thinking that I was ending up with the short end of the stick. That I was lacking in comparison to her.

That’s simply not true. Not for me and not for you.

Don’t let a fake version of me make you feel like you’re less of a Christian or less of a good wife or less of a whatever. Know that somedays I hate reading my Bible and somedays I’m mean to my husband and somedays I just want to crawl into bed and take a do-over. I am making every effort—with every prayer—to make those days fewer and more far between, but, like a pebble poking you in your favorite pair of shoes, they always return.

Friends, this is real life. I’m messed up, just like you are. And that’s probably a good thing, don’t you think?

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The Truth About My Inadequacies: A Lesson from the Old Testament

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