Confessions in Homemaking



Truth: I used to plan out my meals every week, print them out in a spreadsheet and hang them on my fridge.

Confession: That lasted all of a month before I realized that, while I truly do love my spreadsheets and being super organized, they just don’t work for me when it comes to mealtime.

Whenever I read online, I see so many bloggers who sing the praises of weekly meal planning. And I get it, it can be helpful and can really streamline dinnertime. But for me? It was stressful.

When it came time to eat, I didn’t really want what I’d put on the menu. I found that planning our meals caused me to want to get more extravagant with our meals than we really are. We are sloppy-joe kinda folks, not “Tilapia Fillets en Papillote” (whatever that means).

So, I decided to scrap the practice.

Relief! Fresh air!

This is what works for me, for now in this season. No spreadsheet, I just think a few days ahead. Pin a few days in mind to try something new or work around a wonky schedule. Leave a few days where nothing is planned, and I pick it depending on what my taste buds announce sounds good that day. (However, I always make sure to have a well-stocked pantry, so this doesn’t send me running to the grocery store!)

It is flexible, forgiving. It is what works for me.

Homemaking can be so much of comparing ourselves to one another, thinking that because all the other women in blogland are doing it, we ought to, too. But that’s not what homemaking is about. Homemaking is about embracing this art of making our homes comforting and uplifting places for ourselves and our families.

For me, it means that I make my own bread but plan my meals by the seat of my pants. All of my measuring cups have a place, but I don't always put them away, right away. For you, it may mean that you chart your meals out on paper a month in advance. For another, it may mean ordering pizza and keeping the floors spic-n-span. And for another, it may mean those gourmet meals that are completely in a foreign language. And not a single one of those is any better than the other. Not a single one.

Because what works for me, may not work for you. What brings me joy may be torture for you. And that’s okay! Let’s be kinder, gentler on ourselves with this whole homemaking thing. Stop comparing ourselves to everyone else and just enjoy this for what it is: Learning—oftentimes through trial and error—what it is that makes our house a home.

And we all say together: Relief! Fresh air! 

What does homemaking look like to you? How do you make it work for your home and personality? 

Related Posts
Meal Planning with Spreadsheets
Learning to Cook: An Art I Neglected for 26 Years

10 comments:

  1. I agree! I'm super organized and absolutely love spreadsheets, but any time in my life when I've tried to do the whole "meal planning" thing the way other women do it, I end up really frustrated. Now I figure out a few simple meals we can have in a week and I don't stress if we actually eat them or not. I mostly like practical, simple meals, which means we often have all the basics for a dish anyway. The point is that, well, we HAVE DINNER, haha. Not that we follow a plan -- I think some women get so involved in their planning that they forget the planning is only a means to an end. I never would have thought I'd be the type of person to do that, but it works for us!

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  2. So true. It's easy to compare to others in this area. I need to stop comparing myself to other blogging homemakers (many of whom aren't even Christians) and remember to use the Bible alone as my measuring tool for everything. The most important thing in homemaking isn't getting it all perfect, it's simply caring for my family and home. I am going to add a link to this in a post of mine tomorrow that includes my favorite posts from the week if you don't mind.
    Blessings,
    Ashlee @ Capernaum Home

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  3. I agree! We often compare ourselves to others in homemaking and feel we are subpar because we don't make our on flour or cook 3 meals a day. It's important to do what works for you, however you make it work!

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  4. This is fabulous! I have definitely been known to wonder if I was "doing enough," in every category in my life but definitely in all-things-domestic area! I like to make my house feel like a home by keeping it tidy, having lots of art work, and playing uplifting music. Occasionally, I bake cookies, too. My grandfather told me in an e-mail the other day that us "gentler folk" are much to hard on ourselves. So here's to embracing what we do right as an individual, and not worrying what anybody else thinks but God!

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  5. Rachel: You hit the nail on the head! All that really matters is that we end up eating dinner. Why oh why do we get hung up on everything else but that?!

    Ashlee: That'd be great; I'd be flattered to be included in your list!

    The Rookie Years: So true!

    Hannah: Your grandpa sounds like a smart, wise man! I think we need those reminders so much, because it can be so hard to not worry about everything all on our own!

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  6. been thinking about this for weeks now. and all i gotta say is "i concur."

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  7. You would not believe how often I have beaten myself up over my inability to meal plan like 'everybody else' seems to. I work hard to keep my family and home on a tiny budget and can make meals from pennies but trying to menu plan just leaves me stressed and fed up and my family cross and arguing.
    I just stumbled on your blog, read this one entry and have immediately subscribed and been moved to comment to say THANK YOU. Its so nice not to feel alone and 'lacking'.

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  8. So true, elpha! Those of us "lacking" have got to stick together! The fact that you can make meals for pennies seems way more impressive (and worthwhile!) to me than meal-planning! :)

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  9. I just discovered your blog via Crosswalk and you are a breath of fresh air! I will be married 2 years this June and I'm looking forward to reading more about your journey with the Lord and learning how to be a good housewife/woman/everything. Thanks for sharing your stories. :-)

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